I interrup the Introductions...

I know all the introductions to our story haven't been made. However, with Christmas just behind us, I want to share a "Christmas Miracle" with you. This story I share involves many individuals who love me. I have three primary reasons for sharing this story.

#1-The story is an answer to many prayers, therefore, showing me that Heavenly Father DOES answer prayers. The last few months it has been difficult for me to pray, but I now know the Lord answers prayers in his own time and way. Sometimes it's fast and easy, and other times it's slow and difficult.

#2-This story shows how family and friends around the world can help those they don't know. 

#3-Miracles still happen.

So, without further ado, let me start my story.

This Christmas will always be remembered as the Miracle Christmas

Christmas Eve afternoon my dad, Eldon Bohman, was supposed to meet my nephew Zeph Bohman at LAX and fly to SLC. Zeph had flown from Australia to LA to come and spend Christmas and New Year's with my parents. My dad arrived at LAX and went to meet Zeph at Customs. Somehow, Zeph was able to get past my dad and get to where he needed to board the plane to SLC. My dad went everywhere at LAX trying to find information about where Zeph was. Dad was given the go around everywhere he went and asked questions. My dad looked for Zeph everywhere for hours without anyone at LAX helping him. 

My mom called me about 5:30 and told me what she knew was going on. When I got off the phone I told Ryan, Joanie, and Hunter what I I had been told. We stopped what we were doing and Ryan prayed for Zeph's safety and for us to be able to know where Zeph was. 

During the prayer I had a distinct impression to go across the street and talk to our neighbors, Anne M Stephenson and James Mitchel Stephenson. Unknown as to how they would be able to help. I explained the situation to them, and without questions they made phone calls that we, as a family, would not have known to call. Thanks to these wonderful friends we learned where Zeph was and finding out he was enroute to SLC. 

I made calls to my parents letting them know what we found out. Being the closest to the airport we got in the car and headed to Salt Lake. When we arrived at the airport Ryan was going to just drop me off at the terminal. I wanted to go in myself but Ryan said the kids needed to go in with me. I was worried because I didn't want to worry about the kids while I was so worried about my nephew.

Once the kids and I were in the airport I placed them at baggage claim with their phone, and went to a ticket agent. The ticket agent was able to get me up to the gate. However, I somehow missed him coming off the plane. Because I listened to Ryan, and he listened to the Spirit, Joanie and Hunter were in the place to see Zeph at the baggage claim. 

I was able to reconnect with the Zeph and the kids and Ryan picked us up outside the airport. We were able to drive to my parents' and back to Tooele safely. (The sad part of the story is my dad spent Christmas Day in L.A. with no family. He arrived home Christmas night.)

This experience has helped my testimony of prayer expand 10-fold. I know the Lord kept Zeph safe and guided the rest of us to know where he was. I know the Lord put the Stephenson's (who only recently moved in) home so they could help our family. It has taught me that I need to look for the miracles, even small ones; realizing that although I do suffer from mental illness the Lord will put miracles in my path, just to help me grow. The Lord knows each of us and what we are capable of. 
 
So, this Christmas is my "Christmas Miracle" and Zeph is my Miracle. 










Zeph and Abby 
Christmas 2015

Abby (the sufferer)

I apologize for the delay in not having another post. My goal is one entry a week, but when there are holidays, it could be two weeks.

Today I'm going to start introducing our family and whom we represent in our home. Whether it be the suffer, the caretaker, or our children, we all have a story to tell.

As the one who suffers (obviously I'm the one on the right) with the depression and the anxiety it is at times, a challenge to let others in.  However, when my depression became extreme I felt that my Heavenly Father wanted me to talk about what I'm going through and how I'm dealing with these debilitating diseases. It's taken 2 1/2 years to get to this point where I can share our story with the world. Yet, I digress. Let me give some background regarding me.

I was born to two parents who taught us to live righteously. When I was born I came home to three older brothers. Then 3 1/2 years later, my sister was born. We were raised as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. We grew up in a small farming town, where surprise, we lived on a farm. We had chickens, sheep, cows, pigs, you get the point. The town was so small, that if we did something in the morning, by the evening our parents knew about it.

Living in a small town, where everybody knows EVERYTHING, was not always fun. But, there are days now where I wish I could go back to those days of freedom and raise my children in a time when we were not constantly on alert for attacks against our great country.

I was blessed to live within walking distance of my paternal grandparents. I have wonderful memories of snapping peas on the patio with my grandma. Other memories of large family parties, and being surrounded by those I loved, and who loved me. 

My maternal grandparents lived in different states, so I didn't see them as much as my Bohman grandparents. I remember some of their visits, but other times, I don't remember a whole lot about my childhood. 

It sounds like I had a wonderful world growing up, right? Why should someone who had so much love and happiness suffer from depression and anxiety? I don't know. If you figure out the answers to those questions, I would love to know. 

I was not gorgeous, I didn't have a lot of talents and I didn't have a lot of close friends, friends yes, but not close ones. When I entered high school I became friends with a group of friends who accepted me for me. This group was the backbone of my teenage years.

It was in the fall of 1994  that I first entered into my journal, "I hate my life." One sentence, but so much pain in that sentence. I would have my good days and bad days, ups and downs, but never to the point of wanting to hurt myself or others. I kept my feelings to myself so I didn't upset my parents. I was the peacekeeper. I hated confrontation, therefore I hid my feelings.

After graduating high school, I moved to Cedar City, Utah to go to school at Southern Utah University. I met my husband and we were married 3 1/2 months later. He was put in my life when the Lord knew I needed him. Almost 3 years later we had our daughter, then 16 months later we had our son. The lights of my life. I had been put on bed rest for two months with our son and ended up having postpartum depression. I was able to pull myself out of that funk. 

Over the years, I would get into a funk and be able to pull myself out of it. Then in 2013, I lost it. I don't remember 2013 for the most part, but I do remember being hospitalized so I could get on some medication to help my moods and my anxiety. 

The last few years have been difficult on our family. We've had to bond together, and come closer as a family to stay a family. I will never be able to express in words the love I have for Ryan and the kids. I can say with certainty that, if it weren't for them, I doubt I'd still be here. They are amazing! 

Introduction to Anxiety and Depression

Mental Illness. "cringe". How is it possible that we, as humans, can openly discuss cancer, diabetes, MS, etc., but when we hear mental illness, the room goes silent. Mental illness is as important to know about as the aforementioned illness'.

As we write, we will only write about what WE know. This means we will not write about bipolar, schizophrenia, or PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). We have NOT lived or suffered from these terrible mental illness'. We will write about depression and anxiety, for these are the two mental illness' we as a family have been living with -- and surviving -- at the same time.


The hope of this blog is to be the voices rising to get the knowledge that is needed to have a deeper understanding of mental illness. Not just from the sufferers' point of view, but from the caretaker's view, and the view of children who have lived through the hell of not having a parent mentally, and at times, physically present.

There are four of us in our little family. I (Abby) am the sufferer. My husband (Ryan) has been the caretaker of not only me, but our home and family. Last our two children, Joanie (13) and Hunter (11) have missed out on childhood experiences because of my illness. They have needed to grow up faster than their peers.

I'm going to go back to the days of childhood school, where when you first learn a new topic, you are given definitions to give you a base line to begin your knowledge. This first blog may seem tedious and boring to some, I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm not. For those individuals who feel this way, this is only the first entry. To those who need the understanding of terminology that goes with mental wellness, I hope what I give you is simple enough to understand, but not so simple you're left with questions.

The definitions I use will come use from Merriam-Webster online dictionary. The terminology I feel needed are:
sufferer
caretaker
anxiety
panic disorder
depression
counseling

Sufferer - 1 to experience pain, 2 to experience something unpleasant, 3  to submit to or be forced to endure

Caretaker - one who gives physical or emotional care and support

Anxiety - 1 fear or nervousness about what might happen, 2 an abnormal and overwhelming sense of apprehension and fear often marked by physiological signs (as sweating, tension, and increased pulse)

Panic Disorder - an anxiety disorder characterized by recurrent unexpected panic attacks 

Depression -  1 a state of feeling sad, 2 a psychoneurotic or psychotic disorder marked especially by sadness, inactivity, difficulty in thinking and concentration, a significant increase or decrease in appetite and time spent sleeping, feelings of dejection and hopelessness, and sometimes suicidal tendencies

Counseling - professional guidance of the individual by utilizing psychological methods
 
All of these definitions are correct. However, there is a lot more to anxiety and depression than these definitions. For every person who suffers from these ailments their symptoms may be different. Meaning, what my family and I have suffered and felt with my mental illness', another family can have completely different experiences and feelings.

As we continue this journey as a family, we'd like all to know we want AND expect questions in our comments. We want to help others see that there are options when going through mental illness. 

Broken minds can be healed just the way broken bones and broken hearts are healed.
Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, Oct. 2013