Support

“We build deep and loving family relationships by doing simple things together. … Love is really spelled t-i-m-e, time.” —Dieter F. Uchtdorf, Of Things That Matter Most

I recall a conversation I had with my parents shortly after Ryan and I became engaged. We were discussing how short of a dating period we had before becoming engaged (5 days). One of my uncles had asked my dad how he was so comfortable with me becoming engaged to someone in such a quick time. My dad told me his response was "If you saw them together you would know they were a match."

I had forgot about this conversation until the other day while at physical therapy. Ryan and I were talking to the therapist about my health and the therapist mentioned our relationship. He commented that he could tell there was a really strong bond between Ryan and I. His comment made me pause and think about what others see in our relationship. It made me recall other friends who have made similar comments.

Earlier this year one of my friends told me that her goal is to have a relationship with her husband that mirrors ours. We've also had bishops, ward members and other friends make similar comments. Feeling interested, I took to Facebook to see what our current friends and family see when they see Ryan and I.

Here are some of the adjectives that were used to describe us: commitment, honesty, closeness, family, respect, admiration, patience, unity, love, and understanding. Some of these adjectives were used more than once.

I pondered these descriptions and thoughts for a few days, and the question, what do Ryan and I do that makes others see us in this way came to mind.

Ryan and I spend a lot of our spare time together as two, or together as a family. We both respect each other and have a deep love and commitment to our marriage.

The one adjective that I loved the most was patience. I feel this word especially describes Ryan.

Ryan is my biggest support and he has patience aplenty for my health issues. The patience he shows me when he has to drive me from appointment to appointment on every single one of his days off. The patience he shows as he sits in these appointments and listens to what is being said so he knows when I forget. The patience he shows when I do forget what I'm supposed to be doing with my health. The patience he shows when I can't get out of bed and he has to take care of the house and the children. Above all, the patience he shows me and the children as he consistently works to be there for each of us.

Having a great support system is so important when one suffers from mental illness, and having that support be a spouse helps immensely. I am blessed to have that support in my husband, who is my rock and grounding system.

He is the only one who knows how to calm me down when my anxiety gets the best of me. He knows what to say, and what not to say, to help me through an attack. He is always aware of our surroundings and making sure that I will have an "exit" if the situation overwhelms me.

And, back to the quote at the beginning, how has his love expanded to this point in our relationship, it is by T-I-M-E. We spend our time together and our love grows. What a support I have in him.